No Right to Complain!

Another shitty day: literally.  Once again, I started work at 6:00 am: so early.  Because of OCD, I get up at 4:09 am when I have to be at work at 6.  I need the extra time to wipe my ass, which I do excessively: even when I'm on antidepressants, which are supposed to help with such compulsions.  What can I say?  I hate shit; it's gross.  I almost never get all the shit out of me before I have to leave for work at 5:40 am.  I hate shitting and wiping, but I REALLY hate to do it anywhere besides my home.  It's an OCD thing.  So I frequently end up holding my shit in at work on days I start working at 6.  This day was no different.  It can be quite uncomfortable.  But unless it's an absolute emergency, I will hold it in: even if it's a lot of shit.
It was a busy day at work, which reminded me that I wanted to write this, so I'll get to the point.  If you have brought a child into this world, and you are waiting in line (at a store, for instance) or you are stuck in traffic, then you have no right to complain!  A line at a register in a store, traffic, these are the results of overpopulation!  And you have either contributed it by having kids or you haven't (like me).  You did the typical thing.  You wanted a little baby to cheer you up, and that mattered more than your concern about all the horrible things that could happen to your baby.  You also don't have the right to complain about overpopulation.  I heard Al Gore, on TV, complaining about overpopulation.  My first thought was "hypocrite!"  Al Gore has 4 kids!  He's contributed to the overpopulation of this planet 4 times!  Shut the fuck up!  You have no credibility when it comes to this issue! 
Then I came home, and my neighbors were playing their TV very loudly.  I'm glad they're leaving at the end of the month, but who will replace them?  What do you prefer: the devil you know or the devil you don't know?  They could be worse.       

Joy Denied

Yesterday, as I was looking at a cute baby, I couldn't help thinking that I have never experienced the joy of holding my own baby (Because I have no kids.).  And, hopefully, I never will.  I'm not nearly selfish enough to bring a baby into this world.  And on another day in which my body is racked with pain, my neighbors have woken me up, and I'm preparing to go to my job that is unsatisfying (to say the least), I know that I have made the right choice to not bring someone into this hell. 

Smiles & Lies

Smiles and lies try to hide the truth about life in our society.  Watch TV and you'll see plenty of it: especially in commercials.  Smiling people trying to sell shit to miserable people.
Post your pics of you putting your faces together smiling on Fakebook.  Don't post pics of the truth behind the façade: pain, loneliness, despair. 
At work, I dealt with some customers.  I was polite to them.  As the couple was walking away, the woman said, loudly, probably for my benefit, "Hi.  How are you?"  I think she was criticizing me for not saying "How are you?" to them.  I don't like it when cashiers ask me how I am, because I know they don't care.  Why would you want someone who doesn't know you, and doesn't care about you, to ask you how you are?  I don't understand it.  This woman, who I think is a piece of fucking shit, must like all that fake shit.  She must like living a fake and phony life.  I pity her.
Biological parenthood is where the most smiles and lies come from.  Bring a little baby into this fucked-up world to cheer your selfish ass up.  Smile at your cute little baby as you ignore all the pain, shit, and misery that person will have to go through as a result of your pathetic unprotected sex.  Lie to yourself that you haven't done a very cruel thing by subjecting your child to all the shit that life has to offer.
I'm so tired.  I'm in such pain.  It's only going to get worse.

Vicious Circle

"I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up," a typical adult thinks.  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
The baby is born, grows up, and thinks, "I'm miserable.  I'm suffering the pain and disappointment of getting older.  I'm gonna have a baby to cheer me up."  But the "cheering up" doesn't last.
This is how we get to a world of violence, pain, and misery that contains over 7.5 billion people.  How many of them are miserable, disappointed, depressed, in pain, and wishing they had never been born?

(Don't Fear) the Reaper

 
One of my all-time favorite songs: (Don't Fear) the Reaper by Blue Oyster Cult, who are from the same island I am-the long one.  Simultaneously beautiful and morbid.

All our times have come
Here, but now they're gone
Seasons don't fear the reaper
Nor do the wind, the sun or the rain
(We can be like they are)
Come on baby
(Don't fear the reaper)
Baby take my hand
(Don't fear the reaper)
We'll be able to fly
(Don't fear the reaper)
Baby I'm your man
La, la la, la la
La, la la, la la
Valentine is done
Here but now they're gone
Romeo and Juliet
Are together in eternity
(Romeo and Juliet)
40, 000 men and women every day
(Like Romeo and Juliet)
40, 000 men and women every day
(Redefine happiness)
Another 40, 000 coming every day
(We can be like they are)
Come on baby
(Don't fear the reaper)
Baby take my hand
(Don't fear the reaper)
We'll be able to fly
(Don't fear the reaper)
Baby I'm your man
La, la la, la la
La, la la, la la
Love of two is one
Here but now they're gone
Came the last night of sadness
And it was clear she couldn't go on
Then the door was open and the wind appeared
The candles blew and then disappeared
The curtains flew and then he appeared
(Saying, "Don't be afraid")
Come on baby
(And she had no fear)
And she ran to him
(Then they started to fly)
They looked backward and said goodbye
(She had become like they are)
She had taken his hand
(She had become like they are)
Come on baby
(Don't fear the reaper)

Mind Alive

 
My mind is alive today.  I spent yesterday with my closest human friend (My friends consist of dogs, cats, and squirrels as well.).  He is a biological parent.  I finally told him my true feelings about biological parenthood.  I think it is "messed-up" (edited) for people to bring other people, and animals, into this brutal world.  This resulted in a spirited discussion.  My friend, who I'll call Herb, is an intense debater.  If he disagrees with something I said, he'll tell me.  He disagreed with the statement I made.  He said that he thinks "virtually everyone" is happy.  Now I disagree with that statement vehemently.  Just take a look at the suicide rate.  Suicide is consistently a leading cause of death worldwide.  Forgive me if you're aware I've written this here before, but it's only one sentence, and I think it bears repeating.  The American media, by and large, does not report suicides (with the obvious exceptions of stars like Kurt Cobain and Robin Williams), because the CDC has asked them not to.  Why?  Because when the media reports suicides, it leads to more (copycat) suicides. 
Forgive me, I believe I'm currently experiencing hypomania, which has been redlined here (and "redlined" too, but I'll use it anyway), but The New York Times uses this word, and if it's good enough for them, it's good enough for me.  I'm irritable.  I think it's becasue I smoked with Herb yesterday.  According to him, he and "virtually" everyone else are happy as clams (Which is a good one.  Do you think clams are happy?  I don't.), but, as he himself has admitted, he self medicates.
When I told Herb how I feel, and he disagreed, and I admitted my philosophies are based on my own experiences, his response was predictable: "Boo-freaking-hoo. (edited)"  I'm a cry baby.  I'm a whiner.  I'm not afraid to be called a whiner.  I used to be a whiner, then I realized that nobody gave a damn, because everyone has their own problems to deal with.  So I stopped being a whiner.  But I recently thought that "Don't be a whiner." is just a way for the insanity to continue.   "I'm miserable, my life isn't going the way I want it to, but I won't whine about it.  Then I'll bring one or more people into the world, and if they're miserable, I'll tell them to stop whining."  And the vicious cycle continues.
Herb also said that people aren't gonna wanna hang out with someone who thinks that life sucks.  That's understandable, but it's more important to me to be REAL.            

Leave the Rabbits Alone!

baby groundhog

I had seen some kids playing around here.  They were chasing and terrorizing wild rabbits.  I never saw them hurt any rabbits, but I saw them poking at them with sticks.  Obviously, you would be terrorized if you were being chased by giants, and you couldn't understand what they were saying or what they wanted.  They can play amongst themselves, and not be living nightmares for little wild animals.  I haven't hesitated in the past to intervene in such situations, but I regretted not saying anything the first time I saw it.  I had another chance today.  I said something, but it wasn't loud enough, so they didn't hear me.  I saw a girl throw a tennis racket at a rabbit.  The next time they came around, they heard me.  All I said was, "Leave the rabbits alone!"  And they did.  Unfortunately, it's only natural for humans to want to make life miserable for animals.  If protecting them is the right thing to do, then do it.  I certainly wouldn't have touched those kids.  All I'm willing to do is talk to them or yell at them.  Heroes of mine include Gandhi and Martin Luther King, Jr, both believed in non-violent resistance.
On a more positive note, I have come to realize there are at least five baby groundhogs living right next to my building.  So far, Veronica is my choice for mother of the year.  She was out grazing with one of her babies.  Suddenly, she ran toward the family hole in the ground.  That's something I've seen groundhogs do plenty of times.  This time was different.  On her way to the hole, she made several high-pitched noises with her mouth.  It was instantly obvious why she did that.  It was for the sake of her baby, who immediately followed her mother to the hole.  What was all this about?  I looked around and saw an animal I had never seen around here before: a large raccoon.  Veronica watched the raccoon carefully from her position, which was right at the hole.  It's possible she had never seen one before.  Even after the raccoon had been gone for several minutes, she continued to look around cautiously.  Her baby even helped out.  She stood on her hind legs and looked around.  I'm not sure if she even knew what she was looking for, but her intentions were good.  Baby groundhogs are among the cutest animals I've ever seen.               

A Letter from a Dog to Humans

Please be nice to me and don't hurt me.

Please be nice to us.  Please don't ever hurt us.  Sometimes my dad comes home from wherever he goes, and he's very mean to me: even if I did nothing wrong that day.  He yells at me; sometimes he hits or kicks me, and I don't know why.  It seems like he's mad about what happened while he was "out there."  I love him so much, and I still do, no matter what he does to me.  But I love him unconditionally, no matter what, and I wish he'd love me that way too.  I never get mad at him: not even when he gives me a bath or takes me to the vet.
We trust you completely; it's been that way for hundreds of years now.  We put our lives in your hands.  We give you all we have to give: our entire bodies.  We can't give anymore.  Don't you see how wrong it is to betray our trust?  But people have made us fight each other.  People have hurt, tortured, and killed us in lab experiments.
If you're a breeder, please stop bringing more dogs into the world and spend your time doing something better.  So many of us are living in cages in shelters.  When you bring a dog into the world, and someone buys him or her, then there is a dog living in a cage in a shelter that could have been adopted if you hadn't sold that dog.  So many dogs need good homes; please don't make matters worse.
Please don't give up on your dog.  My friend, the bald vegan, was living with his ex-girlfriend years ago.  His ex-girlfriend wanted to get a dog.  The bald vegan asked her to not get a dog, becasue he was too lazy to walk a dog every day at the time, and he didn't yet know how great dogs are.  His ex-girlfriend got a dog anyway.  Just as he suspected, he was expected to walk him every day.  But the bald vegan has strong feelings about animals.  Even though he had not agreed to get a dog, he never once suggested that she get rid of him.  He believes that when you make a commitment to a pet, it should be for life: either the life of the pet or the person.  Even though the little guy bit him several times, he fell completely in love with him, and would not have wanted him to leave his home at all.  Getting a dog, then having a baby, then getting rid of your dog cause you're worried about the baby is a crappy thing to do.