Showing posts with label elderly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label elderly. Show all posts

Friday, December 8, 2017

"Work Sucks, School Sucks, Life Sucks"

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I was watching the news today, and they mentioned the latest school shooting, unless another has occurred by now (only in America).  Before the shooter went on his rampage, he wrote, "Work sucks, school sucks, life sucks."  I couldn't agree more (with the statement, not the shooting).  As usual, I can't be bothered to look back at what I've written before, because I'm lazy, and "been there, done that."  But I'm pretty sure, after another one of these shootings, I wrote that the problem could be as simple as "life sucks."  They hate life, and they hate other people.  People are always annoying the hell out of me.  I don't shoot them, though.  I don't even have a gun.  If I did, I think there's a good chance I'd use it on myself.
I know, I've mentioned suicide plenty of times here, but I'm still alive.  I really don't want to be elderly, though, so I think there's a good chance I'll do it eventually.  I've seen plenty of elderly people that I don't want to be like.  They're fairly helpless.  It's no way to be.  I'm enough of a mess as it is.  If I have trouble with simple functions, like using a credit card, then I definitely don't want to be alive. 

Thursday, October 12, 2017

People Ruin Everything

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People ruin the environment, the lives of animals, the lives of other people, everything.  If I am having a rare good day, then it's highly possible that someone will ruin it.  I sort of don't understand why people would have friends.  I understand that loneliness is not good; I deal with it everyday.  But take the example of my aforementioned frenemy.  There are plenty of times when he and I got along very well.  But it was always just a matter of time until he ruined it by judging me, criticizing me, or yelling at me (for no good reason).  My ex-girlfriend used to be absolutely pissed off that she HAD to go see friends of hers.  What's the point of that?  If seeing friends is like work, then why do it?  My frenemy told me he was going to a Springsteen concert with a friend.  At no time did he want to go.  He complained and complained about it.  Why complain about it to me?  I'm not the one that's going to the concert with you.  But he went, and complained about it some more afterward.
Work sucks, but it's preferable to work outside, where we sell colorful flowers; it's a marvelous display.  As I've mentioned here before, it's good to be outside.  It's natural.  It's the way it should be.  But the outside area at work is definitely ruined by people.  It's amazing how different the two ends of the massive home improvement store I work at are.  In lumber, the customers are mostly men, and they sometimes expect me to know how to build or fix this or that.  I don't know how to build or fix anything.  The garden area of the store might as well be a world away.  Most of the customers are women, and they expect me to know about plants and gardening.  I don't know shit about that.  Lots of the customers there are elderly ladies.  Plenty of them have lashed out at me.  It must be hard to be an old lady.  I'm sure a lot of people treat them like they're slow and in the way, which they sort of are.  I've seen, and dealt with, a depressing amount of elderly people that I never want to be like.  They say, "death before dishonor."  Well, it's dishonorable to be half dead physically and mentally.  I think it makes sense to kill yourself before you become a ghost of your former self.
The elderly lady was buying something from me at the outside register, and she was saying the usual boring shit that I've heard tons of times before.  It's amazing how dull and unfunny many people are when they try to be funny.  I didn't react to what she was saying.  She said something about not talking much.  "Who?" I asked.  "You," she said angrily.  So, once again, I'm the lowest on the food chain.  My position in society is to take undeserved abuse from pathetic old ladies.  The young, tattooed woman who was next in line heard the exchange.  She, unsolicited, mentioned to me how the old lady's attack (on me) was bogus. 
Since we're outside, there is, obviously, no roof to block sunlight.  This means that direct sunlight hits the PIN pad; the glare makes it hard to see.  You wouldn't believe how many morons complain that they can't read its screen, as though it's my, or anyone's, fault.  What do I want to say every time?  "Hey, if I could control the brightness of the sun, I wouldn't be here."  Or, "You could pay inside, which has a fucking roof over it."
Last night, a bit of a connection was made.  I was dealing with a customer who's a very nice guy.  The total came up, and he mentioned that it was the same as the year he was born.  I didn't tell him, but it was the year I was born too.  He talked to me a little bit.  He mentioned that he works 12-hour days, 7 days a week.  Then he added that he's making a lot of money.  You see, he ruined it there by bragging about all the money he's making.  It wasn't necessary.  I think bragging about the money you have, especially to someone who doesn't have much of it, isn't classy.  My frenemy was like that.  Not only did he brag about his money, he told me several times that his sister is rich: rubbing other people's money in my face over and over again.  He is such a piece of shit.  
If you want to laugh, try my Twitter account where I tweet jokes.  It's here: https://twitter.com/TheBaldDBag        

Friday, September 29, 2017

Things I've Heard

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Life sucks.
Life is hard.
Life's a bitch.
Life is pain.
Nobody ever said life is fair.
Stop the world; I want to get off!
"To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering." (Friedrich Nietzsche)
Growing old ain't for sissies. (The horrible implication is obvious.  Getting old means more pain, weakness, vulnerability, deterioration of the body and mind, less independence, possibly being put in a "home."  I went with my ex-girlfriend to the hospital where her mother was spending her last days.  It was horrible: a nightmare.  Frail, desperately lonely elderly people waiting for death.  Impending death was in the air; it was palpable: a horrifying experience.  I had to leave before she did: waiting for her outside in nature: glorious nature, I needed it's natural antidepressant qualities quite badly after that.  This is how life ends for many.  Let that be a grim warning to all you parents out there.  It makes sense that, the shittier the parent, the less your kids are going to want to help you when you need it so badly in your old age.)
"It's the terror of knowing what the world is about, watching some good friends screaming, 'Let me out'" (from "Under Pressure" by David Bowie and Freddy Mercury)
"I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.  That's the two categories.  The horrible are like terminal cases and blind people, crippled, I don't know how they get through life.  It's amazing to me.  And the miserable is everyone else." (from Annie Hall by Woody Allen)

If these things are known and true, and they are, then why bring others into the world to suffer?
 

Just in Case

if you're here from twitter because i stopped posting, i ask that you NOT ask twitter or anyone to do a wellness check on me. i wouldn...