Contempt

I find it very difficult to live in this society, because I have contempt for
-mentally-competent adults that selfishly support animal cruelty by buying meat, leather, fur, etc.
-mentally-competent adults that have procreated
-mentally-competent adults that have brought animals into this world
-mentally-competent adults that spend a lot of time with their faces in their smartphones.
So, once again, obviously, I am not targeting children or the mentally disabled.  I get along with the sorts of people I have just mentioned, mostly because I have to.  I get along quite well with a coworker who eats meat and has kids.  I like her.  Interestingly, we were talking one day, and she admitted, unsolicited, that life is shitty.  Do you regret having kids?  That's the question I wanted to ask but didn't.  I need to do whatever I need to do to get through the day at work.  If I hated, and scowled at, all my coworkers that eat meat, have procreated, and have their faces in their phones every chance they get, I'd be hated.  I have no friends, so I need to try to get along with my coworkers as well as I can.  But whenever I see them eating meat, or hear them talking about their favorite meat dishes, I can feel the contempt bubbling up inside me.  Likewise when I see them with (or hear them talking about) their kids.  Seeing them with their faces in their phones reminds me of the contempt too.
So, again, leaving it all for the wilderness seems like a good idea.  I wouldn't have to be around people I have contempt for.  But the same issues come to mind: bugs bugging me, lack of heat, showers, and toilet paper.  It seems like I can't win.     

Thoughtless Cruelty

I think about animals lots of times every day.  As I've mentioned before, I'm constantly being reminded of animal cruelty and how many people are contributing to it with the choices they make.  It's a big problem for the animals (and those of us that care about them) that people are being thoughtlessly cruel to them all the time.
I wouldn't buy leather: period.  I see people wearing all sorts of leather garments.  I imagine them in the shoe stores.  I suppose leather is a thing to them: a material.  In the shoe store, they probably aren't thinking of it as the dead skin of a tortured, enslaved animal who had been innocent and peaceful.  I suppose they aren't thinking that, if they purchase those leather shoes, they will be supporting violence against cows.
It's the same with meat.  It's a thing: a food.  I suppose those that purchase it aren't thinking it's the dead, tortured flesh of an innocent animal that suffered for the sake of the consumer's palate.  I recently called animal cruelty, especially that which is highly-organized and institutionalized, "the worst conspiracy" in a post here.  It really is.  It's billions of people (currently-I shudder to think how many people over the course of human history have contributed to animal cruelty) getting together and essentially saying, "Sure, what we're doing to animals is horrible, and unnecessary, but, if you do it, and act like you're not doing anything wrong, then I will too."
I'm sickened by animal cruelty.  It contributes to my depression, which is nothing compared to the suffering that thoughtlessly cruel people are supporting whenever they buy meat, leather, fur, etc.  

Corpse Dragger

Today, after writing about animal cruelty, I went for a walk.  It rained all day today; usually that would stop me.  But the upcoming work schedule has me working till 10:00 pm the next 3 nights.  I just don't exercise when I work till 10:00 pm.  I could exercise before work, but I tend to fart around home prior to the commute: old habits die hard.  So I felt the need to do it today: despite the weather.  I dusted off an umbrella that probably hadn't been used in over a year.
As I was descending a steep hill that leads to a river, I saw someone approaching me.  It looked like he was dragging something, and he was stopping periodically.  Great, I thought.  I need to piss badly, and I can't have him interfering with that.  You used to be able to piss in public, and if someone saw you, they could go fuck themselves.  But now every asshole has a cell phone and can call the cops to snitch on you.  I was also wondering if he was a freak.  I saw a freak yesterday.  He was kicking a book hard against some vertical concrete: among other crazy things.  I watched him, because he was approaching my parked car, and I wanted to make sure he didn't do anything to it. 
It turned out the man had been fishing.  He was dragging 2 very large dead fish behind him.  He said hello to me.  Though I didn't want to, I returned his greeting.  I couldn't help it; I was raised with manners.  I don't understand why people, that I walk by in parks, insist on talking to me.  I don't want to talk to you outside a park; I don't want to talk to you inside a park.  I just don't want to talk to you.  I took my piss; then I started to walk up the hill.  I was wondering if he was going to ask for help dragging the fish.  Of course I wouldn't.  The only question was how rude and loud I was going to be if he asked.  Of course he didn't ask me.  I just passed him silently. 
I have compared meat eaters, and leather wearers, to cavemen before.  Cavemen, and cavewomen, used to eat meat and wear furs, so it fits.  They also used to drag the animals they killed.  The guy with the fish is a caveman.  He hasn't evolved.  Those that have evolved are non-violent, and they eat healthy foods: like fruits, veggies, nuts, beans, seeds, and whole grains.  As I mentioned, I passed him (easily).  I wasn't burdened by the weight of dead flesh, and that's how I live my life.       

The Worst Conspiracy

The worst conspiracy is animal cruelty.  Trillions (or more) people over the years have essentially gotten together and said, "Let's pick and choose which animals we care about and which we don't.  We'll care about a small minority of species (pets), but even then, many of us will be cruel to these animals when we feel like it.  For example, we will confine many pets to small cages and fishbowls.  The vast majority (countless) of animals we won't care about.  We will do what we want to this planet.  We will pollute it, which will kill many animals.  We will procreate absurdly, many of us addicted to having kids, which will require that more housing for humans be built, which will result in more wilderness being destroyed, which will push wild animals further into a corner that gets smaller everyday.  We will harm animals at will."  It is likely that, shortly after we got up onto two feet for the first time, we began to attack animals.
I was watching a documentary last night.  A boy had made a slingshot, and was showing another boy how to use it.  I had a bad feeling about where this was headed, and it was confirmed.  One of the boys shot a stone at a bird, and the other boy said, "Awesome!  You almost hit it."  The camera crew should not have allowed that to happen.  One of them should have told the boys that it's wrong to attack animals, but, obviously, they let it happen.  I suppose they consider that to be part of their "art."  Attacking animals for real in a movie is not "art;" it just makes it a sick, twisted piece of shit.
Back to the conspiracy.  "There is no need to eat meat, but we will do so, because we can.  We are stronger than the animals are.  We are smarter than they are.  We will use these advantages to terrorize them.  We will use our cunning to come up with new ways to make them suffer.  Money matters more than anything in our 'culture,' so, of course, we will exploit animals for profit.  Money in our pockets matters so much more than the pain and suffering of animals, that we can't even begin to measure it.  It will be proven, over and over again, that vegan whole foods (fruits, veggies, nuts, beans, seeds, whole grains) are the healthiest foods for us to eat, and that we don't need to eat meat at all.  Plenty of doctors will say and write that eating too much meat can lead to cancer and heart disease, but we don't care.  We want to eat whatever we want to eat.  If MacDonald's came out with a snake burger, and it tasted good, then count us in.  We don't care about our health.  We will do drugs, drink too much, smoke, and be obese, because no one tells us what to do. 
We will kick the dog when we want to.  We will harm her for no reason, because, unlike people, she can't call the police, so we will get away with harming her.  Whenever we feel like it, we will try to make our pets miserable, because we are miserable. 
We will experiment on live animals.  We will do incredibly cruel things to animals in the name of science and progress.  We will not lose sight of the fact that people matter and animals don't, so, therefore, anything we do to an animal, no matter how horrible, if it benefits humans, it is okay.  Even if animal suffering in lab experiments doesn't benefit humans, it is still okay, because it is the thought that counts, and as long as the cruelty wasn't suffered by people, it is okay, because, again, we, humans, matter, and animals don't.  We only care about ourselves; meaning, I don't care about you, of course, just myself: maybe my kids, but if I cared about them, I wouldn't have brought them into this fucked-up world in the first place (but that's another conspiracy).
Even though we support heinous animal cruelty when we buy meat, leather, fur, etc., we will think that we are good people.  As long as we aren't horrifically cruel to people, then we will consider ourselves to be good people.  We will smile when we talk about our favorite meat dishes.  We will dance while eating chicken.  We won't be ashamed of the aroma of the tortured animal flesh we are roasting.  We will shut off the part of our conscience that cares about animals (assuming it was ever there at all whatsoever).  Meat is a thing.  It is no longer an animal.  Come to think of it, the animal was a thing.  He or she was an 'it.'"
Very, very sadly, with attitudes like this, it seems as though there is no end to widespread, systematic, institutionalized animal cruelty.  There has been, and continues to be, an immeasurable amount of needless animal suffering, which exists because far too many people don't care about animal cruelty (Because they don't have to worry about being the victims of the cruelty.).
But you, who supports animal cruelty by buying meat, remember this; TWO WRONGS DON'T MAKE A RIGHT; BILLIONS OF WRONGS DON'T MAKE A RIGHT; NO AMOUNT OF WRONGS MAKE A RIGHT!  If you are a mentally-sound adult who supports animal cruelty, if you are cruel to animals, you are CRUEL (PERIOD).  There's no getting around it.  You better hope that karma isn't real.  If you're religious, you better hope there isn't a hell, cause if there is, get ready to burn.       

Meat Eaters Are Nazis

People who buy meat and leather are quite similar to Nazis.  It's very easy to walk into a store and purchase such items (Apparently all too easy on the perpetrator's conscience as well, that is, if they even have consciences.), but when one does so, one supports the ongoing, horribly widespread animal holocaust, which, unfortunately for the affected animals, doesn't seem to have an end in sight, because there are far too many people who, instead of not caring about Jews, don't care about animals like chickens, cows, turkeys, and pigs (to name only a few species).  Second-World-War concentration camps are quite similar to factory farms.  Both of them contain(ed) pain, suffering, violence, horrible conditions, slim to none medical treatment for their victims, an obvious lack of concern for the victims' well being, and, of course, murder.
I'd rather not be similar to a Nazi.  You're either part of the solution or part of the problem.  There is no middle ground.

Taking a Stand

To be sung to the tune of the chorus of Jethro Tull's "Skating Away on the Thin Ice of the New Day-"
Taking a stand
Taking a stand
Taking a stand on the new land with a plan

A couple of work friends asked me to have dinner with them in a restaurant.  Not surprisingly, both of them are meat eaters.  I insisted that they order no meat at the restaurant. 
"That's not fair," my coworker replied to my request.  Your meat eating is not fair to the animals you're eating.  She also said, "You're around people eating meat here."  We were in our workplace's break room. 
"I have to be around it here," I replied.  Because I have to work and make money to support myself.  I don't have to be around shit like that on my free time.
I hardly ever eat out anyway, and that's fine.  I don't enjoy being served by a server who's being fake nice to me in order to get as big a tip as possible: not my idea of a good time.  It ain't cheap, either, and I am.
My coworker thought my request was unreasonable.  So, instead of being at the restaurant with them tonight, I'm alone, writing, and listening to metal.  I don't want to sit at a table with people who are eating meat.  People eating meat and wearing leather offend me.  What's even worse is when it's wasted.  How can I enjoy myself when I'm worried one, or both, of them is going to waste meat?  Throwing meat in the trash is so disrespectful.  The animals who provided that meat suffered in vain whenever that happens: truly heinous.   

Surrounded by Cruelty

It's not enough that I have to see and smell meat in the break room at work when I'm eating my lunch.  I also have to hear my coworkers talking extensively about meat.  At least 2 of my coworkers think it's hilarious to say that "Bacon makes everything better."  The 2 of them, and others, have repeated this over and over again.  I hate hearing this, especially while seeing their smiling faces, because I know what sort of extreme cruelty people are supporting when they buy bacon and other pig meat products.  They just go on and on, laughing and smiling, about the meat they like to eat.  It is so insensitive.  I can only assume that the animals they are eating mean nothing to them.  This is what animals, and those that really love them, are up against. 
A wise man told me that the only real hope "food" animals have is the development of vegan meat that is cheaper than real meat and also resembles it closely.
In the meantime, cruelty is everywhere.  At work, customers approach me, clad in leather, buying things like mousetraps, gopher poison, and beef jerky. 
I was flipping channels on my TV, and I saw a sweet, innocent, vulnerable, beautiful deer, who was foraging in the forest.  I was full of love and good feelings toward that deer.  However, I know that there are plenty of hunting shows on TV, and, indeed, this wonderful image was replaced by a hunter aiming his rifle at the deer.  I immediately changed the channel, because I didn't want to see that deer get shot.  Shooting at deer is monstrous.  Animal liberation is something that is long overdue. 

Pain & Suffering

I've accepted that life will bring pain & suffering every day.  Every day DOES bring pain and suffering.  The pain is physical, mental, and emotional.  The suffering is mental and emotional.
But it's nothing compared to what animals have to endure because of selfish people.  At work, I have to deal with so many people buying deadly mousetraps and other animal killers.  I want to say something to them, but I don't want to risk losing my job.  I'm trying to live.  Without a job, suicide is more of a possibility.  I want to suggest they use humane methods to trap and release them: unharmed.  If I ever stop giving a fuck altogether, which is a distinct possibility, I might say things like that.  They even buy gopher poison.  I don't know if there are gophers around here, or if they're just targeting my beloved groundhogs.  I'm not in favor of killing either, but it really saddens me to think that people want to kill groundhogs.  They are so cute.
I'm also forced to see a sea of leather.  Some sickos are turned on by leather.  It's dead cow skin.  Cows are peaceful vegetarians.  It's disgraceful, and caveman-like, to wear leather.
At a department store I worked at during the X-mas season, I heard and saw a real cretin in the break room.  She was hideously ugly: inside and out.  She was talking about some sort of family gathering.  "We had 2 things of meatballs, which I didn't need!  I also had sausage."  She told some story about kids who were allowed to shoot birds, which is disgusting and despicable.  She thought it was funny,  In fact, she said a pastor was fine with it: killing for fun.  There's religion for you; people matter (because they put money in the collection plate) and animals don't.  She said she sent a thank you card to the family that contained the bird killers that had a picture of birds on it, and she thought it was hilarious.  Apparently, the father of these kiddie killers got pissed off when squirrels stored nuts in his boat.  She mentioned that, in the card, she wrote that the kids should shoot squirrels instead, and she thought this was very funny.  Hey bitch, animals are cute, and you look and sound like a walking, talking pile of shit.  Fuck you.          

I Love Metal

One of my favorite Black Sabbath albums: Sabbath Bloody Sabbath

I'm referring to the music: not steel or aluminum.  I own many CDs, but against all common sense, I'm in the midst of shopping for even more, because there is a big sale going on at a website that sells metal CDs.  I really, and I mean really, shouldn't buy any more, but sometimes I can't help myself.
Ever since I was a kid, I've listened to hard-rock bands like AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, and Van Halen.  I was one of the last to switch from cassettes to CDs.  Similarly, I still listen to CDs, and I don't have an MP3 player.  I also don't own a cell phone, so I'm always at least a step behind.  Although, I don't own a cell phone because I hate them.  When it came time to buy my first CD, I chose a greatest hits album by Black Sabbath, because I had always liked Paranoid and Iron Man.  I wasn't very familiar with them beyond those two songs.  I was blown away by the CD I bought.  I now have 16 Sabbath albums.  I also had remembered liking a couple of Iron Maiden songs when I was younger.  So I bought their album Number of the Beast.  Again, I was blown away.  Now I have 12 of their albums.  There are many metal bands, and quite a few very different-sounding styles among them.  But, in my opinion, Sabbath and Maiden are the Beatles and the Stones of metal; they're the best.
It's a shame that people stereotype metal and their fans.  It's as wrong to stereotype a metal fan as it is to stereotype someone because of their race, creed, ethnicity, gender, or sexual orientation.  Some people assume that all metal bands and their fans are satanists.  That's ridiculous.  In my collection, there are satanic bands and christian bands.  It doesn't matter to me; all I care about is the music.  And I believe in neither God nor Satan.  Although, if I found out that a band went so far as to sacrifice humans or animals, then of course I would not buy their albums.
Metal is a worldwide phenomenon.  Metal fans exist in nearly every nation: even in countries where they might cut your hands off if they caught you playing metal.
Why do I like it so much?  I didn't really choose it; it chose me.  I love the energy and the power of it.  Even when I buy a metal album and it turns out that I don't like it very much, at least I can usually exercise to it.  I also find a lot of truth in metal.  Much of it is dark: just like life.  So many people happily bring people into this world, gleefully ignoring the fact that EVERYONE is going to die.  There is a whole sub-genre of metal called death metal, so, obviously, this sort of music isn't sweeping death under the carpet, which is something that so many people try to do.
Since I'm a vegan, this sometimes clashes with my tastes in metal.  For instance, I like Judas Priest.  They're a great band.  I just wish they hadn't fetishized leather as much as they have.  There's nothing cool or sexy about leather; it's just dead innocent animal skin.  At least the guys in Judas Priest admit that they are a metal band.  I've read that Ozzy Osbourne was irritated at the suggestion that he was a metal artist, claiming that he was "rock and roll."  If that's true, then he should be ashamed of himself.  Metal fans have made him a very rich man.  I won't buy anymore of his albums, because he has bitten the head off a dove and killed a bunch of cats, among other cruel things he's done to animals.  Of course, he was probably out of his mind on drugs when he did these things, but that's no excuse, and, even worse, he seems to think these things he did are funny; he doesn't seem to be apologetic about it at all.  In my opinion, Ozzy is the luckiest man in the history of metal. Right from the beginning, he's been surrounded by great musicians.  He, of course, established his name with Black Sabbath, which I think is a situation where the music clearly overshadowed his vocals.
I was watching TV one day, and they were talking about the video for Faith No More's "Epic," which ends with a fish out of water flopping around.  Then they mentioned that PETA had complained about that.  Scott Ian, of Anthrax, appeared on the show.  His response to all of that, to the best of my memory, was f--- the fish and f--- PETA.  My immediate thought was f--- Anthrax.  At that point, I already had an Anthrax greatest hits album, so not buying any more of their albums was a very easy thing for me to do.
I love metal, but I don't care how great you are, if you f--- with animals, I won't buy your records.