I Must Be Crazy

I don't give a fuck about my job.  I don't give a fuck about my life.
Today is a day off.  The last few days at work have really sucked.  You see, if I see someone that has some of our merchandise approaching the exit of the store I work at, and I can see that they didn't buy it in that area of the store, I'm supposed to ask to see their receipt, even if they are carrying the stuff in one of our plastic bags.  Obviously, someone could grab a bag, put stuff in it, and walk out while acting as though they bought it.  Although, as I've been obsessively thinking about the events of the past few days, I realize that I've never seen a particular head cashier, who's been working at this store longer than me, ever check a customer's receipt, and that's part of her job.  She spends a lot of time standing by the main exit.  Regardless, she received an award at the last store meeting, because she "seems to never have a bad day."  Maybe she'd have more "bad" days if she was confronting people who were trying to leave the store.  She's also hot as hell, which would explain why she'd get away with anything.
A few days ago, I asked to see a customer's receipt and he was a total prick to me.  It's happened before.  It's not fun.
But, two days ago, a couple of guys exited the area of the store where I was working holding plastic bags with stuff in them.  I didn't ask to see their receipts.  I don't always do it.  I don't like doing it, because I don't like it when people are rude as hell to me, as they sometimes are when I do that.  Later, those guys came back: one of them bringing stuff in one of our bags into the store.  This time, I would confront them.  As they were leaving, I walked up to them and asked to see a receipt.  One of them said, "That's rude" to me.
"That's store policy," I replied.
He got very angry very quickly.  "Don't you see he's got a bag?" he yelled at me.
I walked away and said something about how I don't appreciate being yelled at.  I think his buddy tried to get him to leave as he was leaving, but he said, "No.  He might call the police."  He aggressively got very close to me and continued to yell at me.  I was so worried he was going to hit me, that I backed away from him a few feet.  He pulled a receipt out and yelled, "Do you want to see it?!" multiple times.  Finally, a coworker heard all the yelling and walked over to me, so that he was standing next to me.  The asshole left soon after.  Then I heard one of them laughing loudly outside the building.  I suppose he was laughing at me: the pussy.
I've since realized it's stupid to be a corporate tool.  I should put my ass on the line, I should put my health and safety at risk, for the sake of the owner, who must be rich as hell, highly-paid executives, or wealthy shareholders?  That's crazy.  We have a concrete floor.  Someone could knock me out, and my skull could fracture after it hit that unforgivingly hard floor.  It would be fine if I was murdered; that would be great.  But what if I was crippled?  What if I was injured so badly that I was paralyzed from the waist, or the neck, down?  Then I'd really have a reason to bitch and moan. 
So I need to be smarter about this receipt-checking business.  I should probably ask to see it while I'm behind the counter at least, so there is a barrier between me and him (or them).  Of course, someone could go around the counter, or throw a punch over it.  It should be a judgment call: based on how threatening the person (or people) appear to be.  Most of all, I need to protect myself.  This store rakes in millions of dollars a year, despite what people steal from it.  I need to protect my own skin more than other people's money. 

Shit

 
I shit every day
Every day, I have to deal with shit (literally and figuratively).
Currently, I'm dealing with 2 computer-related glitches: I can't get my printer to work (No surprise, I haven't successfully printed anything in quite a while.), and this blog keeps counting my own page views, which I don't want to happen, and I haven't been able to fix it.
Death would be so much easier.  There's so much shit to do: so much shit to remember.  Life is such a gigantic pain in the ass.  Say what you want to, but, except for that phase where I posted fiction about a groundhog with superpowers (Yes, I did.), this blog is REAL.
I know I've covered this before, but this whole business of bringing people into the world is such a crazy cycle.  Unhappy people, in a desperate attempt to be happy, bring people into the world (for their own sake).  These people start their lives off by crying.  Babies cry a lot.  Perhaps they're smart enough to know they've been brought into a brutal world of pain, misery, and death.  Of course, things will get (a lot) worse for them.  It blows my mind that people have become successful by creating a line of clothing that has "Life Is Good." printed on it.  What bullshit.  Living the lie.  That's what the creators and the buyers are doing: living the lie.
By the way, don't EVER Google images of shit (like I did for the purpose of this post).  You will see real images of human shit, which I can't deal with.  On the other hand, it's probably a good appetite suppressant.  

I am not a human being; I'm an animal

I hereby officially renounce my human status.  I am no longer a human.  Hopefully, I will retain my humanly rights.  I'm lucky to not be a pig, chicken, cow, fish, lobster, cow, or turkey.  Obviously, most people don't care about the way these animals are treated.
Which is why I don't want to be a human.  Every single day I'm reminded how insane this "human" society is.  I'm a vegan.  Most people eat meat, which means they don't care about the animals they're eating.  HUMANS DON'T NEED TO EAT MEAT TO SURVIVE.  In fact, it's much healthier to eat vegan whole foods: veggies, fruits, nuts, seeds, and whole grains.  Most people procreate, which means they don't care about their sons and daughters.  This is a f**cked-up, violent world.  I love my kids too much to bring them into this world.  There is so much pain, misery, and suffering in this world.  To continue this cycle of misery is practically the definition of insanity.   
Animals are innocent.  They are following their natural instincts.  They don't understand things the way humans do.  Their societies aren't nearly as crazy as human society is.  They kill because they are hungry or to protect themselves or their young uns.  Obviously, humans are the biggest murderers in the history of the world.  Even the dinosaurs didn't kill at the levels that humans do ("food" animals, the holocaust, war, terrorism).          
I am so crazy, that I briefly considered crawling instead of walking.  I decided against it because it would probably be too painful and uncomfortable (knees on asphalt).
So people don't think they're animals.  That's crazy.  People have so much in common with animals: mouths, heads, teeth, blood, lips, lungs, brains, drinking water, eating food, sleeping, peeing, pooping, living, dying, skin, noses, limbs, etc.  People are animals.  They're just the worst animals to ever walk the Earth.  The most violent.  The most selfish.  The most destructive.  Good riddance.     

I hate pooping!

Nothing to do with pooping, but it should be seen.

Oh!  I hate pooping so much!  The thrill is gone, and it's been gone for a long time now.  Although, I never get tired of looking at my poop.  I could look at my poop forever and ever and ever and ever.  I hate wiping my ass; that's for sure!  I have OCD, and one of the ways it manifests itself is with excessive ass wiping.  I will wipe, wipe, wipe until I see NOTHING (except for blood, which I've seen on toilet paper plenty of times after wiping) on the toilet paper. 
What a waste of time it is!  I've spent so much of my life pooping and wiping my ass.  Some people are really into juicing.  I Googled, "If you only drink juice, will you still poop?"  The answer, unfortunately, is yes.  The consensus was that you'll have a little, wet poop, but you will poop.  It seems like there's just no way around pooping.  It is a necessary evil.
Also as a result of OCD, I hate pooping anywhere but my home.  I hate pooping regardless, but I despise doing it anywhere else but home.  Public restrooms are gross.  I barely tolerate peeing there.  Those places are germ festivals.  I wear long-sleeved shirts: even in the summer.  The main reason I do it is becasue it covers my arms, so I don't have to put sunscreen on them, which saves both time and money.  But there's another advantage as well.  Whenever I have to grab a handle to enter or exit a public restroom, I touch it with a shirtsleeve instead of my skin.
Ever think about how much poop comes out of all the asses, human and animal, in one day?  It must be tons' worth.  So much poop.  A crazy amount of poop.  There's no doubt in my mind that people have killed themselves because they didn't want to poop, or wipe, anymore.  It's one more thing about life that sucks.
It's amazing to me that people are so sex crazy.  I'm not.  A beautiful woman looks great, but, first of all, she probably won't be into my bald loser ass, and, secondly, she farts and poops, which is gross.  So keep it all in perspective.  The most beautiful people in the world fart and poop out the stink.  They're just like you and me in that regard.