Everyday

The cover of Veganman

Two things are on my mind every single day: multiple times a day.  After all, I'm frequently reminded of them.
First, and foremost, I'm angry, depressed, and frustrated about animal cruelty, and how widespread it is, which is why I wrote Veganman, which is here on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00ZSHNT5I It is the rare story that's more about animals' happiness than people's happiness.  I'm reminded of animal cruelty everywhere: online, while watching TV, listening to the radio, while reading, and every time I go anywhere.
Secondly, I strongly believe it is an act of cruelty for a person to bring people or animals into this world of boredom, frustration, misery, agony, pain, suffering, injustice, hostility, violence, rage, rape, child molestation, hurricanes, floods, tornadoes, earthquakes, tsunamis, avalanches, landslides, rockslides, mudslides, wildfires, arson, (car, plane, train, etc.) accidents, disease, mental illness, suicide, murder, war, terrorism, and death.  I am still sober, and I am taking antidepressants.  I am less depressed than when I was drinking and not taking antidepressants, but, obviously, I still feel this way.
 

Cretins

 
I've been trying to promote Veganman lately.  I've been emailing lots of vegan/animal rights websites and asking them to help get the word out.  I've gotten some positive responses.  I even got a great review from someone who read the book in one sitting.  But I've encountered cretins too.  My Googles have unintentionally brought their slimy selves to the surface.  There's a group on Facebook called "I love animals but hate animal rights activists."  It absolutely disgusted me.  They are probably all meat eaters that are fine with the way animals are currently being treated, which, in many cases, is horrendously.  Whoever liked that page, and there was a depressing amount that did, is a piece of shit, and whoever started it is a colossal piece of shit.  I briefly thought about leaving a comment, then thought better of it.  Those cretins aren't worth my time.
In fact, one of my Facebook "friends" (I don't really know her.  It just goes to show how fake and phony our culture has become.  By the way, I only joined FB to promote my writing.)  responded to a post of mine.  I came across this website that listed Rachael Ray as one of the top 10 animal rights activists: unbelievable!  The bitch cooks dead animal flesh on her show!  She's gotten rich as a result of showing people how to make dead meat delicious.  So I posted what a crock of shit that was.  This is the exchange:
Me: Unbelievable! This stupid website, beliefnet, listed Rachael Ray as one of the top 10 animal rights activists! She cooks meat on her TV show! I left an incredulous comment, which quickly got pushed past the positive ones. What a bad joke.
Her: I eat meat doesnt make me any less a protector of Animals!! 
Me: You're not protecting the animals you're eating. That's for sure
Her: Strange logic!
Me: Not at all. When you buy meat, you're supporting animal cruelty. There's no way around it.
Her: No im a meat eater and being a veggie doesnt stop animals being killed!!
Me: When you buy meat, you're paying "people" to keep animals in horrible conditions. Are you somehow not aware of the horrible ways in which "food" animals are treated? You're also paying them to murder them. We don't need meat to survive. Eating meat is cruel.
Her: (no response)
Then I found (wasn't looking for it) a website that complained about how animal rights activists are driving up the cost of meat, eggs, and so on.  I could only read so much of it.  Someone bitched and moaned that eggs were more expensive cause a law was passed that gave hens more space in their cages (They're still in CAGES!).  Also felt like responding there, but didn't.  Hey, asshole, if eggs are too expensive, how about NOT buying them, you stupid cretin!            

Prose & Poetry

 
Do Not Weep, Maiden, for Death Is Kind

What I want to do most is sleep.  That is how I know I want to die, for death is eternal sleep.  There is  no waking from it.  Every morning, I'm disappointed to have woken.  What I really want is to die, peacefully and painlessly, in my sleep.
Perhaps no one believes the person who threatens suicide will do it .  So many people have bitched and moaned about life and suicide, but most of them won't do it.
I was recently told, during a mental health appointment, that alcohol is a depressant.  I knew that already.  My response?  Life, existence, is a depressant, and it is much more powerful than alcohol.
Now that I've accepted death, I feel a certain peace: a peace that passeth all understanding.
Except for animals, I don't care anymore.  I've heard that (I don't care anymore.) in at least 2 songs (Phil Collins and Wilco).
As I wrote in my memoir, Memoir of an American Loser (under my pen name-Zach Murphy), suicide, for me, is like a blanket that sits on a high shelf in a closet.  It's ready to be employed whenever I'm sure the world is too cold to bear.
And if I kill myself, don't weep for me.  Weep for yourself, and the rest of the living (with the obvious exception of Isis members), because there is no pain and suffering in death: only in life.
I hope my writing survives: my 2 books, one about people's horrible treatment of animals (Veganman) and the other a humorous, bittersweet memoir about the pain of life (Memoir of an American Loser), this blog, and, to a lesser degree, what I've posted on Facebook and Twitter.  There's a lot of other stuff too, but it either isn't finished, or there's no place for it at this time.

Life Sucks: a poem

Life sucks
Life ducks?
Life trucks?
Life tucks?
Life bucks?
Life f*cks?
Life clucks?
Life pucks?
Life mucks?
Life luck's?
Life lux?
No, life sucks

Computer Blues

 
I have not been able to open my documents using the Microsoft Word Starter 2010 program that came preinstalled on my computer for days now.  I'm usually pretty good at finding answers to my computer problems: not this time.  Perhaps it had something to do with the recent "free" upgrade to Windows 10 that Microsoft offered to me.  If I had known this would happen, I wouldn't have taken the bait.  I have been able to use Libreoffice to open documents that I don't care that much about.  But I was updating Veganman before this happened, which was written using MS Word Starter 2010.  I'm nervous about opening, working on, and saving it using Libreoffice.  I don't want it to get messed up or changed.  I'm hoping it'll be OK (if I have to do it that way), because I can't find a solution to this dilemma.
So I think it's likely I'll change my previous position and rat on my next-door neighbor.  These kids are so f*cking loud.  Their mother is loud too.  She obviously doesn't care to be a good parent and keep her kids under control.  I've seen 2 kids, and I've seen 3 kids.  I assume she has 3 young children.  She's a shitty parent.  That's how I feel about it.  She allows her kids to bother the neighbors.  She acts as though she, and her kids, are entitled to be here.  We'll see about that.  I don't want to be a snitch, but I don't want to deal with this shit either.  Since snitches are so hated, doesn't it take balls to be one?  If I can improve my living situation by making a phone call, why wouldn't I?  That's me.  I don't care what other people think.  I don't care what other people do.  I think and do what I feel like thinking and doing.
Have I mentioned how much I hate pooping?  I hate yawning almost as much.  That's how I start the day: pooping and yawning.  Yawning while pooping.  Do I even have to explain why pooping sucks?  I hope not.  It sucks even more for me because of my OCD; it makes me wipe excessively.  Yawning sucks.  It's boring.  Sometimes, my mouth opens so widely, that it hurts my jaw.              

This is Veganman

Don't judge a book by its cover.

The book I wrote, Veganman, is available here on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00ZSHNT5I It's available on other countries' Amazon websites too.
This is the description I wrote for Veganman:
There is no book like this one. It is the definitive animal liberation novel. This book informs while it entertains. It’s violent, because it is an attempt to show people how animals are treated by treating humans the same way. This is an expression of vegan and vegetarian anger. Sadly, it’s not any more violent than the way animals are treated by people every single day. This is the rare story that’s more about animals’ happiness than people’s happiness. This is fiction for a reason. It’s fiction from the heart. Numerous ways in which animals are treated cruelly are addressed. This is a strange book. One chapter might contain violence, because it was necessary to liberate the animals. However, the next chapter might be quite different, because it shows how things have improved greatly for the liberated animals. This book is both an animal lover’s dream and an animal abuser’s nightmare. It’s a result of the author’s love for all animals; he is trying to change the world for their benefit. However, you don’t have to be a vegan to enjoy this story. It’s fresh, original, well-written, well-researched, packed with action, and even funny at times.
As a result of becoming aware of animal cruelty, Mike became a vegan. He read books and learned much about the many different ways in which people mistreat animals. Since people don’t need to eat meat, he became convinced that it was wrong to do so. He dedicated himself to helping animals in need: especially those living in horrible conditions under the control of humans. He used the traditional, non-violent methods to try to change hearts and minds about the way we treat animals, but, when that failed, he realized he needed to become the first true animal liberation soldier. He sent a letter to several media organizations that warned people to become vegans or face consequences. Only after he killed his first two victims, a butcher and a fur shop owner, did the media report the existence of the letter. He continued to punish “enemies of animals.” He also attempted to recruit people to join him. Eventually, people did join him, and the Animal Liberation Organization became a force to be reckoned with. Mike, now Veganman, led by blogging. Activist computer experts made sure his blog was virtually invisible to anyone who hadn’t been authorized to see it. Veganman blogged about different sorts of animal cruelty. The purpose of the blog was to help any animals that needed it. He also commanded his soldiers to liberate animals and punish any humans who got in the way. The liberated animals were transported to spacious sanctuaries where they would be taken care of by real animal lovers. The activists turned the tables on people who abused, or paid others to abuse, animals. They needed funding, so he ordered activists to rob people who had made considerable sums of money at the expense of animals. This fortune provided them with the means to fulfill their wildest animal rescue fantasies. What began with one man became a revolution.
Thanks for all the page views.  

Trying to Survive

 
I haven't blogged properly in a while.  Part of the reason is I was working on Veganman, but that's available on Amazon here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00ZSHNT5I
Today was a pretty good day, mostly because I met up with my best friend.
But I've been thinking about how I have been rejected throughout my life.  I was rejected by my father when I was 2 years old.  I don't have a job, and I keep getting rejected whenever I look for one.  I've written 2 books, but I haven't yet been able to get them published professionally.  They're self-published on Amazon.  But, even though I worked hard on them, I'm proud of both, not many people have bought them, which is understandable because I'm unknown.    
But how much can a person live a life of rejection?  I don't know how much longer I can deal with society shunning me.  Although I've worked as a writer, I haven't had a regular job for a while.  I think this is the biggest reason why I don't get hired.   So I feel like the odd man out.  I'm beyond  broke; I'm running on empty.  I'm living off of credit cards.  I'm pretty depressed, which is why I've been too depressed to blog.
Life isn't fair.  Some people, just because they were fortunate, never had to deal with problems like these.  Republicans would like us to think that life is fair.
Well, this is a test.  I wouldn't blame anyone for ditching this blog.  I've been too inactive.  If I can get some encouragement (page views or comments), that could spur me on to blog more.  Is anybody out there?     

Veganman

Sorry, it's been a while.  I've been down for a while.  I wrote a book and put it on Amazon.  It's called 

VEGANMAN: THE MAN WHO STARTED A WAR FOR THE LIBERATION OF THE WORLD’S ANIMALS

The link is here:  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00ZSHNT5I