It's true. I'm a mess. I don't fit into this world. I'm not the normal person, and I don't want to be. The normal person gets married, brings children into this wicked world, and aspires to have the best landscaping on their block. And, of course, they want to have more money than anyone they know. I must be crazy, I think the life of one mouse is worth more than all the money in the world, and I stand by that sentiment.
By the way, I was sure about it, and now I'm super-sure about it. It is cruel for people to bring people and animals into this world. This is why. Animals bring other animals into the world, and that's fine. They are just following natural instincts and urges. It's completely possible that no animal has ever made the connection between sex and procreation. They have sex because they are driven to do so. But humans know what life has to offer on this planet: pain, depression, suicide, bullying, sickness, disease, suffering, paralysis, loss of limbs, rape, pedophilia, war, murder, violence, incest, torture, terrorism, loss of loved ones, deterioration of mind and body due to aging, and death. But even though we're aware of all this misery, most of us choose to bring people into the world. I've never brought anyone into the world, and I'll never want to. Just because it's been done to me, that doesn't make it okay for me to do it to someone else. I suppose that's what a lot of biological parents are thinking. "It's good enough for me, so it's good enough for you."
I can't believe I forgot to post last week. It was shocking for me to realize that. I blame being a mess and drinking on that.
I survive mostly for the sake of others. I am ready to die. I think life sucks; it's a lot more unhappiness than happiness. But I try to survive, because I want to help animals, many of whom are living in a hell that's much worse than mine. I also want to convince people to not bring other people and animals into this world of pain, misery, and violence. So I have a reason to live, but how much pain can I endure?
dude, i know it sounds bogus, but i live my life 1 hour (not day) at a time. if i let myself think too much about the 100 things i need to get done asap, and how wicked the world is - then i'm all set to jump off a bridge (and there's plenty of bridges to choose from in this town).
ReplyDeletebut by breaking each day down into hours, i become less freaked out, and manage to feel better and get something positive done. as far as being a mess - most people are, but some are better at hiding it than others.
you're an intelligent person. you care about animals. 2 positives right there. did you ever think about joining an animal rights forum where you can share your thoughts and feelings with people like yourself? trust me, any kind of change (even a very small one) can make the world seem like a less threatening place. good luck to you...
Thanks Zachary. That's some good advice. Good luck to you too.
ReplyDelete