They're Back!

Brand new baby groundhog: spring of 2013.

"Will you cut it out already?" I said to the sparrow perched on the telephone line.  She had been chirping the same way over and over and over again.  It's amazing how loud a tiny bird can be.  It's also amazing how annoying they can be.  She just kept on chirping.
"Enough!"  I yelled out the window at her.  I think she heard me, but still she chirped continuously.  This time, I went right up to the window and screamed at her.  She just kept chirping.
"What the heck is going on over there?"  yelled Bumpkin from the bedroom.  "We're trying to watch Groundhog Day here!"
"I'm sorry, Bumpkin," I replied.  "But this bird is driving me nuts!"
Suddenly, the screen slid open, and one of Bumpkin's fireballs of destruction zoomed past me and out the window.  It hit the sparrow and exploded.  The bird had been disintegrated completely.
"Thanks Bumpkin," I said.  Now that that bird was gone, I could hear all the other birds chirping and singing.  One of them was singing a sort of intricate tune.  The problem was it was a very short tune, and she just kept repeating it endlessly.
"Shut up!"  I yelled out the window.  That had no effect whatsoever.
"Hey buster, I told you we're trying to watch a movie in here!" said Bumpkin.
"I'm sorry, but these birds are driving me crazy with all the noise they make.  They never stop; they just keep chirping and singing, chirping and singing till infinity!"
"Do you want me to kill 'em all?" asked Bumpkin.
"No, I guess not," I said.  "Can you think of any other solutions?" I asked.  I immediately noticed that the case that holds my ear plugs opened up.  The ear plugs flew across the room toward me.  Then they gently lodged themselves into my ear canals.
"Thanks Bumpkin, but I was listening to music.  I can't hear the birds now, but I also can't hear the music."
"Shush!"  yelled Bumpkin.  "You always do this when your ear plugs are in.  Your voice gets way too loud!"
I took them out of my ears.  "Sorry Bumpkin, but it seems like there's just no solution to this problem.  Do you think you could ask them to be quiet?"
"I can try, but their bird brains might be too small to properly receive my telepathic request."
"I'd be most grateful if you could give it a shot, Mistress Bumpkin."
"If I do, will you quit your whining?"
"I promise."
"Okay, here it goes."
The birds continued to chirp and sing.
"Did you do it?" I asked.
"Yes, I did it.  I told you I didn't think it would work.  Now will you quit your complaining?"
"Yes, ma'am."  You can't win with these birds.  They're cute, but they're way too noisy.