Saturday, June 15, 2013

Stoned to Death

Fear not the bad man anymore, baby groundhog.
Bumpkin found out about what the evil elderly man did to the baby groundhogs; he threw rocks at them.  I'm sure he never imagined how he sealed his fate with the first rock he threw.  He angered the most powerful sentient being in the history of the world.  She got up early and waited for the nasty man to walk by.  She stared out the window for hours.  She saw him.  She levitated rocks from all over the area.  Once they were in the air, they hurtled at great speed toward the man.  He was shocked.  He was pelted over and over again with rocks.  He tried to cover his head and run, but he was constantly being hit by rocks.  Bumpkin did not want him to run away.  He was going to die; that was certain.  Bumpkin wanted him to die within sight of the hole where the baby groundhogs and their mother were attacked by him.  She sent 2 rocks at hyper velocity toward the man's kneecaps.  The rocks shattered them.  He had no choice but to crumple to the ground.  Rocks continued to hit him mercilessly.  He continued to cover his head with his arms.
"Suffer if you want to," said Bumpkin.  She increased the speed of the rocks that hit him.  Blood stained the man's white shirt.
Sweetpea poked her sweet little head out of the hole to see what was going on.
"That's right, Sweetpea," Bumpkin said.  "Come on out and watch the bad man die.  He won't try to hurt you or your sisters anymore.  He's going to die."
Sweetpea came out of the hole and so did her mother and sisters.  They watched as the man's body continued to be struck by rocks.  Sweetpea scampered over to the man.  By this time, he had lost a lot of blood.  Sweetpea dipped her front left paw into a pool of blood and began to write on the sidewalk.
"I knew it," said Bumpkin.  "I knew that Sweetpea is far from being the average groundhog."
Sure enough, Sweetpea wrote her name on the sidewalk using the bad man's blood.  When she was finished, she calmly crawled onto the grass and began to eat.
"Now the circle is complete," said Bumpkin.  "Sweetpea and I have enough power between us to conquer the universe.  I'm sure of it."
The man continued to bleed.  In fact, he bled out and perished where he fell.
"Good riddance," declared Bumpkin.   

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