Baby Groundhogs

What a cutie!  I think that's grass in her mouth.

I'm lucky enough to be living right next to a hole where a mother groundhog lives with her three babies.  They are all very cute.  A wild-eyed rabbit approached a baby groundhog curiously, a little too close for the baby groundhog evidently.  The baby groundhog sprinted at the rabbit: scaring her off.  That's a pretty tough baby groundhog.  I was in a band called Baby Groundhog; we sucked. 
I think that the scrawny groundhog around here impregnated the zaftig mother, she had the babies, then she was done with him.  I saw her chase him away.  She might have been saying, "Don't eat this grass!  This is for my baby groundhogs!"
The babies are afraid of everything: with good reason.  I think I saw the mother chase one of her babies.  Perhaps she went out without her mother's permission.  The mother knows which sights and sounds to fear from experience that the baby groundhogs do not have yet.  So many a sound will cause a baby groundhog to run toward the comfort of the hole where she's being raised.
Speaking of holes, I recall the first time I realized where the mother groundhog lived.  I surprised her by emerging from an area where not very many people walk around.  She sprinted, like her life depended on it, toward the building in which I live.  Where is she going, I was thinking.  She dove into a hole; then her head popped out of it.  She was so cute that I couldn't help smiling and waving at her, but I don't think she liked that.  I think she wanted to be invisible to me, because the giants frighten her.
Groundhogs are beautiful animals, and, as far as I can tell, and I 'm no Jacques Cousteau, they seem to be very quiet too.  Not like the birds they share grazing duty with.  Even though noise is noise, I prefer loud birds to loud humans.
By the way, I've been listening to Paul Davis, and he is awesome.  What a syrupy-smooth voice.  Now I'm listening to Gloria Estefan's greatest hits.  I'm being assaulted by the Conga.  This music would be better if she was dancing to it right in front of me.  Wootay!
What else can I say about groundhogs?  They're a credit to the community.  They are rising property values.  They should get into politics; they've got my vote.  The least-qualified groundhog would still do a better job than G.W. Bush did.  But what if he turned out to be a Hitler Groundhog?  That's a scary thought.  I guess it's best to take it slow.  Animals don't yet have the right to vote, and maybe they don't need it.
I have achieved many involuntary erections as a result of petting dogs.  They were completely involuntary; I want to stress that emphatically.  I have never touched the sex organs of an animal intentionally.  I have accidentally during innocent petting.  I also have never rubbed my sex organs on an animal.  Innocent petting can cause an erection, I believe, just cause it feels good to pet something soft and furry.  Perhaps the sexual subconscious recognizes that the body is in close proximity to another sexual being in the sexual world.
But the question that must be asked is Would petting a groundhog give me a boner?

Birds Are Driving Me Crazy! (Part Deux)

Little bird make big noise

This is one hell of a noisy world.  In my home, I'm either hearing people making noise, or animals, or both at the same time.  Sometimes I'm hearing several people and animals making noise simultaneously.  I never thought this would be true, but birds are worse than people when it comes to making noise that bothers me.  They really don't seem to mind being annoying.  I'll admit that some of them sing sweetly.  However, even when they do, they tend to be very repetitive with their singing: like a human singer who sings the same line over and over again.
Chirping is much worse than singing.  Typically, I'm hearing one or more birds making the same exact sound repeatedly.  It seems like some of them have no plans to stop.  They're usually pretty loud too.  I suspect that these are juvenile birds who are saying, "feed me," and it's clear that their hunger never dies.  Unfortunately, birds don't seem to sleep very much.  At a certain time of night, they finally quiet down.  However, they've woken me up around 5:00 a.m. several times.
I believe that people have committed suicide because birds have driven them to do it.  Many, many people have committed suicide for many different reasons.  Every 17 minutes of every hour of every day, someone commits suicide in the United States.  I suppose I should get out more and go to places where there are less birds, or the birds are quieter.  
We humans believe that this is our world, and everyone else is a squirrel trying to get a nut.  I'm not so sure.  Ever imagine how many sparrows are currently living in this world, let alone the total amount of birds?  They can fly, and we can't.  They are thriving.  They are driving me insane.  They're not letting me forget about them.  They're reminding me that they're there nearly every one of my waking moments.
I'm not going to hurt any birds.  Sometimes I can hear a bird chirping on my bedroom windowsill.  I usually march right over there and say, "chirp!  chirp!  naughty birdie!"  The sparrow looks at me, jumps off the windowsill, and usually flutters down to the ground.  Sometimes she has nest-building materials in her beak.  This is preferable, because she isn't as loud when she's got stuff in her beak.
I love all animals.  I just love the quiet ones more.  

Danny Rolling

This is not Danny Rolling; this is Bumpkin.

Like many people, I am fascinated with serial killers.  I recently read Helter Skelter and a book about the BTK strangler.  I plan to read at least two more books about serial killers after I'm done with what I'm reading now: a book about suicide.
The serial killer who I find to be most interesting is Danny Rolling.  In 1990, over the course of a few days, five of his victims were found.  Four of these victims were women.  As far as I know, most serial killers who kill women target prostitutes.  They're easier to kill, because you can find yourself alone with one shortly after meeting her.  Also, sadly, they are less likely to be missed.  This is why serial killers, like Gary Ridgway (The Green River Killer), are able to kill so many.  It's obvious that, throughout history, many prostitutes have been murdered.  This is part of what makes Rolling unique.  He killed five college students in Gainesville, Florida.  Students attending college in the area, their parents, and people living in and around Gainesville were terrified.  This wasn't supposed to be happening there, and it wasn't supposed to be happening to people like that.  Since Rolling was killing college students, the public undoubtedly put more pressure on the police to catch him.  Danny Rolling wasn't in it for the long haul.  
Rolling raped his female victims, then killed and mutilated them with a large hunting knife.  He posed their bodies to shock those who found them.  He decapitated one of his victims and put her head on a shelf.  According to what I read about the murders, he let his victims know what he was going to do to them before he did it.  As far as the male college student he killed, that seemed to be a wrong place at the wrong time sort of situation.  He was well over 6 feet tall, weighed over 200 pounds, and it was clear that, from all the defensive wounds he had sustained, he had fought hard for his life.
Rolling, in addition to being a killer, also expressed himself artistically.  On a TV show I watched about him, I briefly heard part of a song he wrote and performed; it sounded pretty good.  These were the lyrics I heard: "Mystery rider, what's your name?  You're a killer, a drifter gone insane."  If memory serves, he also wrote some poetry: "I'm everyone's worst nightmare come to life: a maniac with a knife."  Additionally, I've seen some of his drawings on the Internet: pretty good (creepy too).
Also on TV, I saw an interview with Rolling.  He was talking about when he got caught.  While smiling, he said, "great googly moogly."  Great googly moogly!  He was talking about getting caught for committing 5 incredibly brutal murders.  When I saw and heard that, I had one thought: sociopath.  Predictably, a woman fell in love with him after he was arrested.  That was another incredible moment: when he suddenly began to sing to her in court.
I don't like serial killers; I'm not a fan of theirs.  I just think they're interesting.  They're just another product of this sick society of ours.  Rolling, and his brother and mother, were beaten many times by his sick, abusive father.  Obviously, this is what can happen when people who have no business being parents become parents anyway.  They create monsters.              

I Hate Taking Care of My Teeth

One of my valued neighbors: Flopsy

I wish I didn't care if they all rotted right out of my big bald head.  But I do care, that's the problem.  I start by brushing my teeth after eating breakfast.  Then I gargle with mouthwash.  Then I gargle with a fluoride rinse.  After eating again, I brush my teeth again.  Then I floss.  Then I chew a couple of xylitol mints, which are supposedly good for oral health.  After eating for the third, and final, time of the day, I brush again.  Then I chew a couple more of the xylitol mints.  Approximately 12 hours after gargling with mouthwash for the first time that day, I do it again, followed by 2 more xylitol mints.
The worst part is flossing.  I hate flossing so much.  It's such a pain in the ass and a pain in the gums.  Since I have OCD, it makes it flossing even more of a pain in the ass.  That little annoying voice in my head is always ready to pipe up.  Did you floss between those teeth or not?  I think I did, but I'm not 100% sure, so I better make sure.
A dentist once recommended that I avoid sugar completely.  I have a lot of discipline when it comes to eating (I'm a vegan and I don't eat as much as I'd like to because I want to be slim.), but I'm not even close to being ready to avoid sugar altogether.  I don't know if I'll ever be able to do that.  Failing that, the dentist recommended flossing after eating or drinking anything that had sugar in it, which, I'm pretty sure, includes naturally sweet foods like bananas and strawberries, even though they contain no added sugar.  That means that I won't consume anything with sugar in it after I've flossed, and I usually floss in the morning.  I'd allow myself to eat or drink something with sugar in it if I were to floss again, but that's the point.  I don't want to floss again!  Once a day is my limit.  
I waste so much time taking care of my teeth.  And, of course, it's boring as hell.   To be or not to be, that is the question.  To take care of your teeth or not take care of your teeth, that's another question.  I might be better off just letting them rot.